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ralphjd

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One met a chap tonight at a talk I gave on my book and his g/father is mentioned in it, I asked where his medals were and he has one of the three, I have one of the three (he doesn't know this) do I give it him or sell it, can't remember where or how I came by it. My instinct is to let him have it, my wife says let him buy it. :(

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I guess the question is, how much would you be out by giving it to him? And, I would maybe ask him if he knows what happened to the other medals, since he only has one of the three? The answer he gives might guide your next steps...

-Daniel

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Does he seem bothered that he only has the one?

The choices are probably give it to him, but he still won't have the set or keep it yourself.

It would be interesting to ask him how he acquired it.

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I reckon if you are happy for him to have it, the least he can do is pay the going rate for it. He may want to sell the other to you?

Mike

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I would give it to him for free, that is if he had not previously sold it.

But with the proviso that if he did sell what would be a pair of medals you had first refusal and a discount on his asking price for the pair.

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If Ralph bought it, then he has the right to ask to recover the cost. It's not his fault the medal came to him legitimately? He can give it away if he likes, but he is not obliged to. If I was the person with the other medal, I would be more than happy to have it back, and to pay the going rate for it.

Mike

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It's a situation I've often pondered, and more importantly you have to think how you would feel if the roles were reversed.

For what it's worth I wouldn't hesitate to offer it to him. The fact that he came to your talk indicates he's a decent chap with an interest in his grandfather and the war? Chances are he'll offer to cover your costs anyway - I certainly would.

Regards

Tom

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One met a chap tonight at a talk I gave on my book and his g/father is mentioned in it, I asked where his medals were and he has one of the three, I have one of the three (he doesn't know this) do I give it him or sell it, can't remember where or how I came by it. My instinct is to let him have it, my wife says let him buy it. :(

I noticed someone on the forum researching a great uncle to whom I had the unique death plaque. As the interest was plainly sincere, I contacted them and offered it to them at the cost to me, plus P&P.

I had no qualms about, effectively, wanting my money back: I wouldn't really make a stranger a gift of £60 in any usual circumstances.

If he's serious about the subject, offer it to him: and recover your costs if any.

Cheers,

GT.

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Thanks all , only realised after posting that I have two of the three , not one. Makes a huge difference.

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Hi,

I have made the mistake of returning a medal to a family for free only to see it on eBay 6 months later so, if he genuinely wants the medals, then I am sure he would be prepared to at least pay the going rate

Steve

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I was in the same position not long ago. I sold the items at the value they were to me. It was a unique "pals" type Somme casualty. I really did not want to part but the family convinced me they would treasure them.

TT

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Checked my account on the auction site and paid £106.47 inc postage back in May 2011. Gone up a bit now I would imagine and then add the missing medal = up even more I would say. Ralph

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Tough choice! Did he BUY your book? If yes, then you may want to offer him the option of buying both medals from you with the condition of first refusal if put up for sale as a trio.

Of course, how the medals came to be available in the first place may influence your offer, especially if he DIDN'T buy your book!

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Kevin. Only perused the prototype copy of my book, but yes he said he would purchase one when published, I have emailed him as to how the group got split up in the first place, not heard back as yet. Ralph.

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Option 3 offer to buy his medal if he asks how much rather than "no way hose" as Dell boy would say , you would know what is likely to happen to the trio if you gave / sold them to him.

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Good point Welshdoc, I have hinted in my email to him "you have the Victory medal which I presume you would never part with" ? see where it gets me. Thanks. Ralph.

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Option 3 offer to buy his medal if he asks how much rather than "no way hose" as Dell boy would say

More likely 'No way Pedro'!!

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If it were me, I'd sell it to him at the cost I paid for it **IF** he's interested in keeping it in the family and didn't sell it off recently.

Several years ago I had an IGS08-Afghan1919 to a Captain IA for sale on my site. Out of the blue I was contacted by his grandson on the phone (if I recall) who was training here in Canada (British Army) and was about to head off to Afghanistan himself. After some discussion, I sold it to him for what I paid for it and he had no problem doing so, even though I'm sure I could have made a few bucks by charging market rate.

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Depends how skint you are. Let him know you have them and see if he offers to pay. I he doesn't have issue paying what you did then its a good guide he wants to hang onto them.

For me...reuniting them with the rest of the group and the family would be enough reward.

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Imagine it from his perspective; it is a once-in-several-lifetimes opportunity to reunite the three medals and, if they were my grandfather's, I would offer you the market value of the two you have plus some of any increase in the value of the medals as a reunited trio - and still feel grateful that you were prepared to make a deal. In fact, I would positively insist on paying at least the market value because, for the opportunity to "buy back" the missing medals, that would feel like the only honest thing to do.

If you are prepared to offer them to him "at cost", that is an act of generosity on your part (which I heartily applaud) but I don't see that you are under any moral obligation to do so.

Edited by woollamc
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Decided to offer them to him at the price I paid plus a wee bit. Will keep you posted as to his response, if any. Ralph..

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  • 4 years later...
On ‎3‎/‎5‎/‎2014 at 14:50, ralphjd said:

Decided to offer them to him

Ralph,     This all has me very curious.  Whatever happened, please ?

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Yes please, update us on the results.

I'm thinking that nice guy that you are if he agreed to buy the medals back at a fair price for both of you then you might have added a copy of the book signed to him as a part of the deal. Hope it all turned out well for all involved.

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I'm on the hunt for medals issued to a number of my relatives.  If a collector had them and offered them to me at cost, I'd bite their arm off. 

 

Hope this situation reached an equitable conclusion.

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Dear bif, Loader, and Buffnut453,

Isn't it odd that ralphjd never answered the question(s)? It is a bit like reading a novel, only to realise that somebody has ripped out the last page!

I possess my grandfather's medals, but if anyone should offer, say, my great-uncle's medals (KiA 1918 Palestine with the ALH), I would gladly pay hundreds. 

The thing is, these people do not have to sell. It is often somewhat of a dilemma for the collector who regards the medals in question as a Keeper group...

Kindest regards,

Kim.

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