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The Great War (1914-1918) Forum

Remembered Today:

The 1st Baker Pal Wounded in Action!


Guest Ian Bowbrick

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Guest Ian Bowbrick

This afternoon whilst my bro was showing me a German 'butcher' bayonet he had just bought it slipped out of his hand and went through my shoe and into my left foot :blink:

6 stitches, a tetnus jab (guess where!!) and course of antibiotics have been prescribed.

Apart from suspecting my bro wanted to be an only child, does this qualify me for the first Baker Pal wounded in action?

Ian

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No Ian, sorry NO purple heart,

instead you are qualified for courtmartial because of self inflicted wounds.

Or was it a "late revenge"?

Is your bro working for the Huns?

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I would recommend you for a "purple foot" which might be a bit superfluous since you no doubt have a real one of these . I wont speculate on the colour of the injection site.

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Ian

From one old crock to another!

You are hereby medically reclassified B (ii) and transferred from 1st Baker Pals to 1st Baker Employment Company.

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I think a court martial is a little harsh.

Surely a tetnus jab in the ***is punishment enough for anyone - Ian doesn't say what happened to his Bro - he's the one who should be disciplined! :o

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Can it actually be classified as "in action" though, as it didn't take place "in the field"?.

I once fell out of a tree at Hill 60 whilst trying to take an "aerial" photo of the area and fractured my wrist. Would this count?

PS.The photo turned out fine! :D

Dave

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That is definately self inflicted Dave and furthermore you failed to report the incident - convene the court martial without delay! "Bone Crusher" will preside - expect no mercy!

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I do actually know someone who was wounded on the barbed wire at the Triple Tambour craters at Fricourt on the morning of 1st July.

It was about 8 years ago and was dealt with by a paramedic in the "platoon". Will Ian be strutting around all weekend displaying his "war wounds"?

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Martin

What War wound . The only thing that I will have Is a Damm Good Hangover on Sunday Morning I hope ????. After the Forum Dinner

Does That count as a War Wound???

Cheers

Brian

:lol::P

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Sorry Brian -Martin let the cat out of the bag. You are due to be severely punished at the kangaroo court er, court martial, convened on April 12th. Lesley will deliver the coup de grace.

However, if you do get a late pardon, can we maybe meet up at Pozieres as suggested. When will you be there (God and justice willing, of course)

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Guest Ian Bowbrick

Having now slept on it, I can positively say that anyone who would 'shoot themselves in the foot' or bayonet as in this case probably regretted it after, apart from the obvious court martial and firing squad, the pain is $%&*!!!

As for the jab in the posterior, unfortunately not delivered by a cute nurse, but by some old trout who probably threw the javelin in the Russian Olympic team 1972!

Ivor - You are right, we are probably both now the founding members of the 1st Baker Infantry Labour Coy (certain irony to that!). I am so pleased you did not mention an Agricultural Coy as her indoors would probably have me cutting down more trees :lol:

I suspect said Bro is actually playing for the opposition, probably the Prussians, so an SIW is a bit unfair!! However he is my bro and probably getting me back for stealing his marbles or first girlfriend or something!

Anyway I have joined in the spirit of the whole thing by dressing in the 21st Century version of hospital blue!

Ian

(Purple Foot & Scar)

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As for the jab in the posterior, unfortunately not delivered by a cute nurse, but by some old trout who probably threw the javelin in the Russian Olympic team 1972!

Ian

Unfortunately nurses are no longer required to be 'cute' - present day ones are designed to be 'professional'.

Get well soon - Sue [more 'trout' than 'cute' ]

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Three days away in Ypres rubbing shoulders with the great and good in the form of Jacky Platteuw and others at the US WFA conference and what do I discover but someone trying to get himself transferred to a cushy office job? No punishment yet found will be bad enough. Pity I won't be at the forum users' dinner on Saturday to pronounce sentence in person.

Nice to be back though,

Bonecrusher.

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Serene Highness Justice Bonecrusher

I'm sure Lesley 'Witchfinder Pursuivant' Talmer will carry out your orders, and several female members are assigned to inspecting various parts of Ian's anatomy at the earliest opportunity.

Demon Moderator

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Guest Ian Bowbrick

Sue,

You are right my apologies for my late 20th century non-pc ness!!!

Being a professional with a smile is better than being a professional looking like Saddam Hussein :lol:

And yes she did have a moustache :lol:

Ian

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Ian

Now I know you were in some pain with the foot, but were you still able to differentiate between the sexes - sounds to me that the moustachioed Saddam lookalike could well have been male - a lot have appeared in hospitals since the cessation of hostilities in 1945!! :P

Regards - Sue [ever smiling professional]

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Guest Ian Bowbrick

Sue,

I don't know many men called 'Janet'! :lol:

However you never know it could have been Saddam or even one of his lookalikes - I hear they are looking for new jobs at the moment :lol:

Ian

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As a former nurse and carrying the nickname of "Bloodthirsty" from an earlier post, I wonder if Our Serene High Justice Bonecrusher, Kate, and Lesley would appoint me as "Lady High Executioner" to deliver the final jab, if Bonecrusher deems it necessary!

Since I have not renewed my nursing license for donkey's years, I can assure everyone that I most likely would make a proper mess of the whole thing!

Cynthia

:ph34r:

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All right, Witchfinder Pursuivant, Bloodthirsty and Demon Moderator, now let's get down to business. What shall it be for someone whose clear and self-inflicted injury has such a poor excuse? Put up against the Cloth Hall as target practice for drunken hooligans with empty beer bottles (if such people are ever to be seen in Ypres) or doing the washing up at Charlotte's after the dinner next Saturday, plus tidying up and taking out the trash all without a drop of Belgian beer? Methinks he'll go for the Cloth Hall.

Bonecrusher L J

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As Lady High Executioner, I think he should be put against the Cloth Hall, while a selected 'firing squad' of cute, smiling Belgian student nurses use him as 'target practice' for their injections!

Kate, Lesley -- what do you think?

Bloodthirsty Cynthia

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I guess you girls still didn't get it right: he will be shot at dawn. No nurses , no rich nieces, only the lonely firing squad. He asked for it - he got it!

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