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The Great War (1914-1918) Forum

Remembered Today:

Black Adder Goes Forth: Favorite lines


equusv

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Darling It's not easy getting transfers, you know.

BA Oh, you've tried it yourself, have you?

[Darling breaks his pencil.]

Darling No, I haven't.

BA Trust you to try and skive off to some cushy option.

Darling There's nothing cushy about life in the Womens Auxiliary Balloon Corps.

(I'd already been beaten to my favourite Darling quote, the diary note..)

and.....

Nurse Mary: Oh, Edmund, I thought there was something beautiful between us. I thought you ... loved me.

Edmund: Nahhh.....

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anyone can be a navigator if the can tell their @rse from their elbow. (went down particularly well at RAF Finningley; home of the RAF Navigator training school!)

And for me the best bit with that line is that it's referring to Baldrick, and a little while later when it's all but forgotten...

George - Well then, for goodness sake, Sir, why don't we join?

Baldrick - Yeah, be better than just sitting around here all day on our elbows.

:lol:

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Melchett: Well, fine body of men you've got out there, Blackadder.

Edmund: Yes, sir -- shortly to become fine bodies of men.

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Scene. Capt. Blackadder & Nurse mary in bed.

Nurse Mary (speaking about a dead boyfriend)

"He bought it"

Edmund:

"Oh, I'm sorry ,I didn't realise that was the arrangement. Now, lets see, three nights and four - no five afternoons...

Scene. Capt Darling being interrogated

"I'm as English as Queen Victoria!!"

Edmund: " So your father was German, you're half German and you married a German! Baldrick, where's that cocker spaniel?"

Chris C

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Corporal Punishment

Firing squad Leader: Well, sir, we aim to please. Just a little firing squad joke there, sir! You see, sir, we take pride in the termanatory service we supply. So, is there any particular area you'd like us to go for, hmm?We can aim anywhere.

Edmund: Well, in that case, just above my head might be a good spot.

Firing squad Leader: You see, a laugh and a smile, and all of a sudden the job doesn't seem quite so bad after all, does it sir?

Firing Squad man 2: No, and a lovely roomy forehead.

Private Plane (the best ever IMHO)

von Richthoven I must now tell you of the full horror of what awaits you.

Edmund Ah, you see, Balders. Dress it up in any amount of pompous verbal diarrhoea, and the message is`Squareheads down for the big Boche gang-bang'.

von Richthoven As an officer and a gentleman, you will be looking forward to a quick and noble death.

Edmund Well, obviously.

von Richthoven But, instead, an even worse fate awaits you. Tomorrow, you will be taken back to Germany . . .

Edmund Here it comes!

von Richthoven . . . to a convent school, outside Heidelberg, where you will spend the rest of the war teaching the young girls home economics.

Cheeers

Dominic

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[Melchett's office]

Melchett .... Now let's talk about something more jolly,

shall we? Look, this is the amount of land we've

recaptured since yesterday.

[Melchett and George move over to the map table - which is covered in turf ]

George Oh, excellent.

Melchett Erm, what is the actual scale of this map, Darling?

Darling Erm, one-to-one, Sir.

Melchett Come again?

Darling Er, the map is actually life-size, Sir. It's superbly

detailed. Look, look, there's a little worm.

Melchett Oh, yes. So the actual amount of land retaken is?

[Darling whips out a tape measure amd measures the table.]

Darling Excuse me, Sir. Seventeen square feet, Sir.

Melchett Excellent. So you see, young Blackadder didn't die horribly

in vain after all.

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Anything ever said by Lord Flasheart.

Blackadder: "Is this the plan where we continue with total slaughter until everyone is dead except for Field Marshal Haig, Lady Haig, and their tortoise Allen?"

Gen. Melchett and Lt. George:

"Row, row, row your boat gently down the stream...

Belts off, trousers down, isn't life a scream?"

"Ask me why I wear no pants"

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George: Well, but this time I'm absolutely pos we'll break through! It's ice cream in Berlin in 15 days.

Edmund: Or ice cold in No Man's Land in 15 seconds.

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BA: "Hopeless, there just isnt anyone." Bob sings goodbyeee in background. BA "What am I doing BOB "! Bob "Sir" George " Sir what a brilliant idea, Bob can you think of anyone who can be our leading lady?

George(ina) " Oh after all he is a General I didnt think I could refuse he might have had me court-martialed"

Blackadder " Whereas on the other hand he is going to give you the Victoria Cross when he lifts up your dress on the wedding night and finds himself looking at the last turkey in the shop"

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Melchitt: Never ignore a pooh-pooh Blackadder. I know an officer who did once....he pooh-poohed it. Well, turns out the man who had pooh-poohed him had pooh-poohed a lot of other officers, who pooh-poohed their pooh-poohs. In the end we had to disband the regiment....morale totally detroyed.....by pooh-pooh.

Blackadder: Yes, but in this case sir I think the pooh-poohing was entirely coincidental.

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