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The Great War (1914-1918) Forum

Remembered Today:

Why did they not talk about the war...


LCpl Lee Cope

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Hello

Maybe its because we were only kids, and that generation thought it was an in appropriate conversation to have with a seven year old.

I can assure you they spoke about it, but to each other. Who remembers in the early sixties all those old chaps around town with missing arms and legs, I do! not something you see so much today.

I also remember going out on a Sunday lunch time with Mum and Dad to the local club, and all the old limbless ex service men standing at the bar talking about the laughs they had had, and horror's they had seen.

They spoke abut it alright, but not to me co's I was seven.

Ray

My grandma used to talk to my mother about their experiences of the blitz and I used to be behind the sofa or under the table reading or colouring and heard all sorts of WW2 tales. Although I did give myself away one day as I was shocked yet intrigued by what I had heard, I stuck my head out and asked a question. My grandma and mother were then shocked as they had no idea I was there. I was swiftly ejected and I can clearly remember my grandma saying I shouldn't be hearing things like that (a man had had his head blown off in their Anderson shelter when my mother was two years old and my grandma was trying to find out if she remembered anything or was she too young at the time so she related the events in all their gory details - that's why I was shocked).

Yes I recall the men from that war who were physically disabled from their experiences. I also recall the men who were mentally wrecked because they were in the same hospital as granddad. They had been POWs and horrifically tortured and had never been out of hospital since their repatriation. It must have been much the same after WW1 for a variety of reasons and probably on a greater scale. Having read the book 'Forgotten Lunatics of the Great War' it had quite a profound effect on me.

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The only time I would say anything to my Kids or Grandkids, would be if they wanted to join up. I would hopefully deter them from doing something so stupid.

Bit like my Dad I suppose - he worked down the pit until seriously injured - he told me all the details of the job which put me off for life! he would not even let me go on a school visit down the pit.

Maybe as well, they got the reaction I did when disabled out. I could not get near a job and wondered why. So I dumped my 'I was in the Army' routine and got three interviews and offers. The employer I went to did ask me after about a month and I told him my previous occupation. He said that he would not have considered me had he known but I had proved him wrong in his view on ex-army.

Basically there are many and varied reasons why men/women keep quiet.

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From an ex soldier (1976 - 1985) i know what Ed is talking about. Just ask any soldier that served in Northern Ireland, or did his bit during the Falklands campaign....you just cannot tell the whole story to your nearest & dearest.

Dave

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There is no one answer fits all. According to my mother my grandfather was prepared to talk about the war but my grandmother gave him hell if he did as she thought it an unsuitable subject for children (both my grandmothers were formidable ladies and she had once told W B Yeats not to get above himself - the other one once ticked off T E Lawrence in public and many years later did the same to president Tito so when they said no. no meant no.). My late wife's grand father back in the early 70s when he was in his eighties took the approach that he'd spent nearly 4 years of his life in the army which wasn't pleasant but much the same for millions of others but in the other 80 plus years he'd educated himself, started and built a successful business, married and raised a family, been widowed, remarried in his early 60s and raised another family, was still working (and incidentally driven an ambulance in the blitz) and didn't see his life as defined by that short period of 1914 18. Nevertheless when he died a couple of years later (watching the TV to see if his horse would win) the numbers of old gentlemen who attended his funeral wearing trios was significant (and they all melted away silently afterwards)

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Perhaps like all shared experiences it was not unique, so as many people and their families had been through it, it wasn't considered all that unknown so no need to share it at the time, and that stuck with them throughout their life?

Certainly after the second warld war POW's families were contacted and told to not ask questions about their experience, and to change the subject if their loved one did start talking about the horrors they went through.

Didn't Max Hastings say something like "we got to the WW1 veterans too late" with regard to recording their story and the many aspects of the WW1 experience.

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Ed, thank you so much for your point of view. All you said is true.

Egbert, 38 years active duty

None of my adult children nor my wife is interested in my experiences. So I shut my mouth.

When our soldiers return from AFG today they thankfully receive psychological expert treatment to cure the post traumatic stress syndromes from terrible things they encountered.

Then, after WW1, things were different. I fully understand the role of the veteran leagues and associations of the various disintegrated former activeInfanterieregiments post war - these were the only places they met like-minded comrades and could talk about their horrors and -in lieu of professional psychological help- they tried to overcome the horrors in their inner circle groups.

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